Say what you mean

DSCF8986I’m buying a house. Not on my own but with my other half/partner/girlfriend… what do you call your significant other when you’re in your 40’s anyway?

So, yes, we’re buying a house. Nothing unusual there except the whole process is proving to be a nightmare in communication and (I’m going to make up a word here) “numptyness”.

The funny thing is that I know buying a house is like the 3rd most stressful thing you can do in your life.  I’ve done it before, twice so it’s not like I don’t know what to expect. I know this, I’ve accepted it and being the organised, sanguine person I am it’s not the sort of thing that really should bother me.

But it does

That’s why I’m writing this.

You see, it’s not the estate agent (or men in sharp suits with too much hair product as our solicitor calls them) causing the stress. It’s not the solicitors either. In fact, our solicitor is awesome. He’s awesome because he says what he means and he means what he says.

I’ll come back to that

My problem is that the vendor is a complete muppet.

A flaky, slippery, incompetent plank.

Our solicitor calls him “matey boy” I call him a waste of oxygen.

He accepted our offer in December because he wanted a quick sale. We have no chain (other than the one he’s pulling); He has no chain. We’re cash buyers, he’s moving into rented.

It’s as about as easy as it gets.

The problem is that he keeps moving the goal posts.

He wanted to move fast “I’ll move in with my father if I can’t find anywhere to rent quick enough”.

Except now he wants to push us back 2 weeks because he’s found a place to rent but can’t move in till the middle of April.

He promised us the 16th of March. Our solicitor knows it, his solicitor knows it, the estate agent knows it, his father probably knows it.

The thing is that it’ll cost up money to stay in our rented because of the way our lease works. We’ve also chosen not to renegotiate the price after the surveyor told us that the windows are not weatherproof due to his negligence in not maintaining them. This is a man who marked an X on a plan indicating the position of the septic tank in the wrong place. He put it on the drive way when it’s on the field next door. He’s only lived there five years after all.  Which begs the question – do you have right of access?

You get the picture.

Now he’s saying, we’re delaying proceedings to cover up his incompetence.

Excuse me? We’re still waiting for the guarantee for the extension you had rebuilt which you said you hadn’t.  Lucky for us our estate agent knows the previous owner…

Please – just say what you mean and mean what you say.

Don’t try and wriggle out of a situation you created through “numptyness”.

Don’t change it and if you have to, hold your hand up and make it easier for the people you let down.

In a world of negotiation, un-kept promises and men with too much hair product I just want someone, somewhere to be straight.

I’m going to whisper this – “I feel sorry for our estate agent; Sue is an absolute hero. She even called him matey boy yesterday”.


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